THRIVE: HEAVY LIES THE CROWN - WHERE MEDIEVAL PEASANTS HAVE MORE DEMANDS THAN A TWITTER MOB
Ever wanted to be a medieval ruler but thought Crusader Kings III had too few complaints about furniture distribution? Thrive: Heavy Lies The Crown is here to remind you that even in the Dark Ages, people really cared about their work-life balance.
WELCOME TO MICROMANAGEMENT HELL
Let's get this out of the way: this game takes micromanagement to levels that would make an Amazon warehouse manager blush. Want to set up a simple trade route? Better break out that spreadsheet software. Your peasants won't just walk an extra block to get their apples – no, they need a granary every three feet or they'll throw a fit that would make a toddler look reasonable.
THE PEASANTS ARE REVOLTING (IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE)
Your subjects have more specific demands than a Hollywood rider. Hit 40 farmers? Suddenly they all need luxury couches. Because that's historically accurate, right? The happiness system is about as predictable as a dice roll in a tornado, swinging from "life is great" to "we're all doomed" faster than you can say "please just eat your damn apples."
BUGS: FEATURES IN DISGUISE
Being in Early Access, Thrive has more bugs than a medieval plague doctor's collection. Save games sometimes decide to take a permanent vacation, the UI occasionally goes rogue, and your builders might suddenly decide that construction is more of a suggestion than a job requirement. But hey, at least the graphics look pretty while everything's falling apart.
THE GOOD STUFF (YES, THERE IS SOME)
When it works, there's actually a solid game trying to break free here. The world map system is clever, letting you establish multiple settlements that actually exist in the same space rather than just being menu options. Combat, while basic, adds some spice to the city-building formula. And the whole tyranny vs. benevolence system promises interesting choices, even if right now it mostly means choosing between different ways to disappoint your citizens.
VERDICT: NEEDS MORE TIME IN THE OVEN
Thrive: Heavy Lies The Crown is like that ambitious chef who tries to make a seven-course meal but hasn't quite figured out how to boil water yet. The ingredients are all there for something special, but right now it's about as well-balanced as a drunk juggler.
If you're the kind of person who enjoys spreadsheet management and doesn't mind some Early Access jank, you might find something to love here. For everyone else, maybe wait until they figure out that people can, in fact, walk more than ten feet to get their groceries.
7/10 - Like being a medieval king, if that king spent most of their time adjusting trade routes and apologizing to farmers about their couch situation.
We at NLM received a key for this game for free, this however didn't impact our review in any way.