Russian Roulette: Online Review - Digital Russian Roulette Where the Real Loser is Your Wallet
Well, folks, it seems the developers of Russian Roulette: Online decided to play their own version of Russian roulette with game design, and boy, did they lose spectacularly. This game is about as stable as a Jenga tower in an earthquake, and twice as frustrating.
"Multiplayer" - A Euphemism for Digital Purgatory
Let's start with the multiplayer, shall we? The devs promised us an adrenaline-pumping experience with up to 15 players. What they delivered is more like a slideshow presentation of disappointment with 12 increasingly irritated participants.
The network latency is so bad, you could probably send a carrier pigeon with your move written on its leg and get a faster response. After each turn, you've got enough time to go make a sandwich, do your taxes, and contemplate the life choices that led you to play this game before anything happens on screen.
Single Player - The Least Terrible Option
If you're a masochist who enjoys playing Russian roulette alone (which, let's be honest, is just called suicide), then you're in luck! The single-player mode actually functions. It's about as exciting as watching paint dry, but hey, at least it works.
Graphics and UI - A Visual Feast... for the Visually Impaired
The graphics in this game are so bad, they make Minecraft look like a ray-tracing showcase. The UI seems to have been designed by a toddler who just discovered MS Paint. It's like they were aiming for "minimalist" but overshot and landed squarely in "we couldn't be bothered."
Gameplay - As Deep as a Puddle in the Sahara
The core gameplay loop is about as complex as a game of "Heads or Tails," except with more existential dread. You click a button and pray. That's it. That's the game. It's less "Russian Roulette" and more "Russian Bore-lette."
Technical Issues - It's Not a Bug, It's a Feature!
Frame drops? Check. Lag? Double-check. Bugs? More than an entomologist's wet dream. This game runs about as smoothly as a car with square wheels. The developers seem to have taken the "Russian" part of the title too seriously and filled the code with more vodka than a Moscow nightclub.
Conclusion - A Shot in the Dark (and a Miss)
Russian Roulette: Online is less of a game and more of a practical joke played on unsuspecting Steam users. It promises thrills but delivers bills - therapy bills, that is, for the trauma of wasting your time and money on this digital dumpster fire.
If you're looking for an adrenaline rush, you'd be better off playing actual Russian roulette. At least then you'd only have to suffer through it once.
Score: 2/10 - One point for having the audacity to charge money for this, and another for making me laugh at how bad it is.
We at NLM received a key for this game for free, this however didn't impact our review in any way. Our standards, on the other hand, have never been lower.