ROGUE WATERS REVIEW: WHEN XCOM MEETS PIRATES AND FORGETS TO BRING RUM
Ever wondered what would happen if XCOM had a drunken one-night stand with FTL while watching Pirates of the Caribbean? Well, Rogue Waters is that beautiful bastard child. It's a tactical roguelite that combines ship-to-ship combat with turn-based boarding action, serving up a platter of strategy with a side of "yarr" that's both engaging and slightly undercooked.
BATTLE OF THE TWO SEAS
The game's combat is split into two distinct phases, like a pirate who can't decide which leg to put their peg on. First, you've got three rounds of naval combat where you can blast away at enemy cannons, modules, or crew. It's basically like playing battleship with actual consequences. Each decision here matters more than a compass in a storm, since damaged cannons won't fire back, broken modules won't provide buffs, and wounded crew members won't be dancing jigs when you board their ship.
THE BOARDING PARTY
Once you're done playing long-distance tag with your cannons, it's time for the main course: boarding combat. The tactical battles play out like a drunken chess match where everyone's trying to push each other overboard. You'll spend more time calculating optimal shove distances than a physicist at a sumo wrestling match. The environment comes into play beautifully, with everything from open fires to spike walls ready to introduce themselves to your enemies' backsides.
THE CREW YOU NEVER KNEW YOU NEEDED
Your ragtag band of misfits consists of specialist units with their own skill trees and abilities, plus some "mates" who serve as cannon fodder. The specialists can mix and match abilities from different classes, leading to some hilarious combinations. Want a cook who's also a combat medic and a bloodthirsty reaver? Go for it. It's like building the world's most dysfunctional pirate family. The progression system feels like opening presents on Christmas morning, if Santa was a bloodthirsty buccaneer.
SHIP HAPPENS
The ship management aspect adds another layer of strategy thicker than a whale's blubber. Your vessel can be upgraded with various modules that affect everything from crew health to damage output. It's like pimping your ride, except your ride is a wooden deathtrap floating in monster-infested waters. Speaking of monsters, you can summon sea creatures to aid you in battle, though the first one you get is apparently better than free grog at a sailor's wedding.
THE SHALLOW END OF THE POOL
Unfortunately, Rogue Waters starts running out of wind faster than a ship in the doldrums. The battlefields get repetitive quicker than a sea shanty on loop, mostly consisting of small ship decks that start feeling like you're fighting in the same IKEA showroom over and over. The story, while entertaining, ends faster than a barrel of rum at a pirate convention, wrapping up in about 10-15 hours if you're not pushing the difficulty levels.
DIFFICULTY AND PROGRESSION
The game offers more difficulty levels than a lighthouse has stairs, unlocking over time like achievement badges at a paranoid perfectionist's convention. The progression system is actually quite generous, rewarding failure with enough resources to ensure you're always moving forward, even if it's at the pace of a three-legged turtle.
THE SOUND OF THE SEAS
The voice acting sits somewhere between charming and cheesy, like a pirate trying to impress a noble. The humor in the dialogue hits more often than it misses, though you'll hear certain lines repeated more often than a parrot with a limited vocabulary. The sound design and music set the mood nicely, even if they're not going to win any awards for originality.
BUGS AND FEATURES
The game occasionally bugs out harder than a mosquito at a blood bank, with some players reporting soft locks where characters just stand around jiggling like they've had too much grog. The difficulty curve is also about as consistent as a drunken sailor's walk, starting challenging but becoming a cakewalk once you figure out the optimal strategies.
REPLAY VALUE AND ENDGAME
Once you've finished the main story, the game offers endless runs with increasing difficulty levels. However, like a chest full of fool's gold, it starts to lose its luster when you realize you're just doing the same things with bigger numbers. The lack of variety in maps and enemy types becomes more apparent than a pegleg at a ballet recital.
THE VERDICT
Rogue Waters is like a promising first mate who hasn't quite earned their captain's hat yet. It's got solid fundamentals, engaging combat mechanics, and enough tactical depth to keep strategy fans entertained. The humor hits more often than it misses, and the core gameplay loop is more addictive than rum-soaked hardtack.
What's here is thoroughly enjoyable, offering a unique blend of naval warfare and tactical combat that feels fresh in the roguelite genre. However, like a ship with a small leak, its issues slowly accumulate: repetitive environments, limited enemy variety, and a story that ends just as it's getting interesting.
For its price point, though, you're getting a decent amount of plunder. Just don't expect it to keep you entertained for months like some of its more robust genre companions.
Score: 7.5/10 - Like a pirate's first treasure map: rough around the edges but leads to some genuine fun.
We at NLM received a key for this game for free, this however didn't impact our review in any way.