DUNE AWAKENING: NO PRIVATE SERVERS AT LAUNCH, FUNCOM SAYS "DEAL WITH IT"

Looks like our dreams of ruling our own private slice of Arrakis are going up in sand. Dune Awakening, Funcom's upcoming survival MMO, is launching with all the flexibility of a dead sandworm.

OFFICIAL SERVERS ONLY, YOU PEASANTS

Creative Director Joel Bylos, in an interview that probably left him wishing for a stillsuit to hide his sweat, confirmed what we all feared: no private servers at launch. That's right, you'll be stuck on official servers like a Fremen in a moisture trap.

Bylos tried to soften the blow, mumbling something about "multiple servers on a farm." Great, so we get to choose which identical sand pit we want to play in. How generous.

FUTURE POSSIBILITIES OR EMPTY PROMISES?

But wait, there's a glimmer of hope on the horizon! Bylos hinted at the possibility of renting out private servers in the future. Because nothing says "immersive sci-fi experience" like paying a monthly fee on top of your game purchase to play the way you want.

Oh, and if you were hoping to mod your server like in Conan Exiles? Forget about it. Bylos shut that down faster than a Harkonnen coup, citing "game balance" concerns. Because God forbid we have fun in ways the developers didn't explicitly approve.

THE PRICE OF PRIVACY

If Funcom does eventually allow private servers, expect to pay through the nose. Based on Conan Exiles' model, we're looking at about £10 per month for a measly ten slots. That's more expensive than actual sand, and probably just as entertaining.

REALITY CHECK

Let's be real: this is an MMO, not your personal Dune playground. But with Funcom emphasizing PvE over PvP, private servers don't seem like such a crazy idea. Maybe they're just waiting to see how many players they can cram onto official servers before they start selling us our freedom back.

So there you have it, would-be Fremen. For now, you'll have to play nice with others in Funcom's official sandboxes. Just remember: he who controls the servers, controls the universe. And right now, that's definitely not you.