HEROES OF HAMMERWATCH II REVIEW: WHEN PIXEL ART MEETS PAIN (IN A GOOD WAY)
Ever wondered what would happen if Diablo and Rogue Legacy had a baby, then raised it on a strict diet of pixel art and masochism? Well, Heroes of Hammerwatch II is here to answer that question with a resounding "Get ready to die... a lot."
WHAT'S OLD IS NEW AGAIN (AND BETTER)
As someone who's sunk an embarrassing amount of hours into the original, I can confidently say this sequel cranks everything up to eleven. The pixel art is crispier than grandma's cookies, the combat feels meatier than a butcher's freezer, and the progression system is more addictive than those mobile games that keep asking for your credit card info.
DEATH IS JUST A MINOR INCONVENIENCE
Let's talk about the gameplay loop, because boy howdy, is it a doozy. You'll dive into procedurally generated dungeons, get your ass handed to you by everything from basic wolves to trolls that treat you like a golf ball, then crawl back to town with whatever resources you managed to salvage. Die (and you will, repeatedly), and you'll lose 40% of your loot – a tax rate that would make even billionaires cry.
BUILD IT AND THEY WILL DIE
The town-building aspect is where this game really shines brighter than a paladin's holy smite. Every run, successful or not, contributes to building up your little settlement. It's like playing SimCity, except your citizens are all murder-hobos preparing for their next dungeon dive. The satisfaction of upgrading your town and watching your characters get incrementally stronger is pure dopamine-fueled joy.
FASHION SOULS: PIXEL EDITION
New to the sequel is a proper equipment system that lets you mix and match weapons and armor regardless of class. Want to make a wizard wear heavy armor and swing a sword? Go for it, you beautiful weirdo. The subclass system adds another layer of customization that makes each character feel unique, even if they're all going to end up equally dead at some point.
MULTIPLAYER MAYHEM
Playing with friends is where this game transforms from merely fantastic to absolutely chaotic brilliance. Nothing quite matches the hilarity of watching your entire party get wiped out by a boulder trap, only to realize your healer was too busy checking their inventory to save anyone. The netcode works surprisingly well, though occasionally it decides to have a stroke and sends you on an impromptu loading screen vacation.
THE NITPICKY BITS
It's not all sunshine and rainbows in our pixel paradise. The lack of cloud saves is more annoying than a mosquito in your bedroom at 3 AM, especially if you're trying to play on both PC and Steam Deck (LOOK ALL I’M ASKING FOR IS BEING ABLE TO CONTINUE MY SAVE GAME WHILE ON THE TO- while in bed). Some UI elements seem designed for ants, and the tutorial could use a bit more hand-holding for newcomers who don't speak fluent roguelite.
CONCLUSION
Heroes of Hammerwatch II is like comfort food that occasionally punches you in the face, and somehow that makes it taste better. It's a masterclass in "just one more run" game design, even when that one more run turns into five hours of your life you'll never get back.
For veterans of the series, this is everything you loved about the original with a fresh coat of paint and some seriously smart upgrades. For newcomers, prepare for one of the most addictive gameplay loops this side of pixel paradise. Just remember to occasionally check if the sun still exists.
Score: 8.3/10 - Like getting repeatedly hit with a pixel art hammer, but in a good way.