FAST FOOD SIMULATOR REVIEW - WHERE DIGITAL PTSD MEETS MINIMUM WAGE MAYHEM
Ever wondered what it's like to experience a mental breakdown while trying to perfectly squirt exactly three drops of ketchup on a burger? Well, strap on that virtual name tag because Fast Food Simulator is here to give you all the workplace trauma without the actual paycheck.
WELCOME TO HELL'S KITCHEN
This game is like if Gordon Ramsay had a fever dream about running McDonald's during a rush hour while being chased by hungry wolves. The core gameplay loop is simple: take orders, cook food, serve customers, and try not to have an existential crisis when someone orders a burger with exactly 2.5 pickles and their drink preference changes more times than my ex's relationship status.
SMOOTH LIKE PROCESSED CHEESE
The mechanics are smoother than a milkshake made with real ice cream. Everything from flipping burgers to operating the register feels satisfyingly tactile, like you're actually there making minimum wage in digital form. The attention to detail is impressive - you can even get locked in the freezer by your coworkers, just like in real life (yes, this is an actual feature, and yes, it's hilarious).
FEAR THE DRIVE-THRU
Once you hit level 15 and unlock the drive-thru, the game transforms from "manageable chaos" to "who replaced my coffee with pure adrenaline?" Managing both counter and drive-thru orders feels like trying to juggle flaming chainsaws while reciting the entire menu backwards in Latin. It's beautiful madness, but it might make you question your life choices.
SOLO TEARS OR MULTIPLAYER FEARS
Playing alone is about as relaxing as performing brain surgery while riding a unicycle. The difficulty spike at level 10 hits harder than reality after your third energy drink. But throw some friends into the mix, and you've got the perfect recipe for beautiful disaster. Watching your mate panic over pickle placement while you're desperately trying to remember if that order wanted two or three squirts of mayo is pure entertainment gold.
WOULD YOU LIKE AN AI HELPER WITH THAT?
The AI helpers are like that one coworker who means well but somehow always manages to be in exactly the wrong place at the right time. They'll handle basic tasks like cleaning tables and taking orders, but don't expect them to save you when things go nuclear during rush hour. They're there to give you hope, then watch you spiral into madness anyway.
THE PROGRESSION PROBLEM
As you level up, the game keeps throwing new ingredients and features at you like a deranged cooking show host. It's exciting, sure, but sometimes it feels like the game is just finding increasingly creative ways to test your sanity. Want to serve ice cream? Here's a machine that's more temperamental than a cat in a bathtub.
CONCLUSION
Fast Food Simulator is like therapy in reverse - it creates the exact trauma it should be helping you process. But somehow, it's more addictive than those suspiciously tasty fries it lets you serve. Despite its masochistic difficulty spikes in solo play and the fact that it'll probably give you PTSD about condiment placement, it's a genuinely entertaining experience that shines brightest in multiplayer.
Score: 8.4/10 - Like getting yelled at by your boss, but actually fun this time.
We at NLM received a key for this game for free, this however didn't impact our review in any way. Though we might need therapy after having nightmares about perfectly aligned pickle placement.